Last night I dreamed I was walking at dusk through a dense forest, and as the light began to fade I emerged into a clearing. I suddenly felt that something was deeply wrong - and then I saw them.
The emoticons.
Thousands of them, motionless like beach balls on the ground, staring at me in the near-darkness with their colons for eyes. Then, they started chanting.
BLOG
BLOG
BLOG
BLOG
BLOG
BLOG
BLOG BLOG BLOG BLOG BLOGBLOGBLOGBLOGBLOGBLOGBLOG
And then I woke up, cold.
I was uncomfortable, before, with the word "blog", but now I'm downright creeped out. I think, to avoid confusion, the only solution is to use b**g. The nice thing about b**g is that it leaves some room for interpretation - a first-time reader might think it means "boog", which could be a truncation of "booger" - or perhaps indicating a plethora of boogers - or maybe one would think of "bong", "bang", or "borg" - it all depends on your state of mind and familiarity with marijuana and Star Trek (please avoid mixing these two things). What is really cool is that some people will think it's a new secret swear.
So anyway, I'll get around to writing more about Montreal.
I'm going to start calling you booger if you don't let go of your shame of b**ging.
ReplyDeleteIt's raining in Vancouver. We had our last summer day yesterday. I sat on the veranda with my Russian homework and my roommate brought me a vodka and OJ concoction. A full glass worth. Three sips later and I was spilling my words and my drink all over the thyme and rosemary chilling on the deck. Thank goodness, because they needed the watering. It was all quite wonderful. But now it's raining and my bike is out of tru. B**g.